You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
