I must be too annoying 4 u.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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