i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
