Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
