sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Boobs speak an international language.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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