That's when you crack a 10am beer
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
