and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
