theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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