I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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