What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
