I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
My life is pants optional.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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