I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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