I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize