My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize