Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
