We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I can't turn off my feet"
Randomize
