i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
