New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
