he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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