I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
