he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
