1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
