Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize