She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
