So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize