belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
