How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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