Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
