Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Why can't burritos get me drunk
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
