There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
only if we run a train.
done.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
