Say something about gay babies.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
