Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
