i think my tv is drunk
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
