hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
