He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
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