Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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