I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
