so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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