Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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