Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
