I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
