Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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