come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Randomize
