Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize