Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Randomize