Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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