How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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