The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I don't deserve a penis
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
