My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Randomize