I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
