Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
It's blow job season.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
